question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
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