Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
Randomize
