I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
Over Bumbled last night. I think I set my dog up on a date Sunday afternoon. I have to drive him, meet the other dog’s dad and secretly drink a bottle of champagne from a “water bottle”. This is not what I expected 30 to be like.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize