Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
Randomize
