I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
Randomize
