ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
Randomize