Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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