Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
