they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
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