It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize
