What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
barbara walters just said penis...
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Randomize
