one might say we're banned from that church
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Randomize
