It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
So drunk its hurt
I accidentally broke up with him while I was drunk which is really too bad since I'd just gotten a birth control perscription so we could start having sex.
Do you think he'd take me back if I said "dude, we need to get back together or this IUD is going to have an existential crisis for not realizing its full potential"?
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
Randomize
