Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Randomize
