THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
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