Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
I got inside last night via doggy door
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
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