I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
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