I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
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