do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
Randomize
