So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
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