yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
Randomize
