i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
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