Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
