Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Randomize
