You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
The one thing I know about living in Vegas is the closest I'll ever come to being a father is singing the theme song from Full House to a garbage can while I eat an entire birthday cake.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
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