I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
Randomize
