erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
i will never coherently bang her
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
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