So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
