LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
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