I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
Randomize
