Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
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