just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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