one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
I don't deserve a penis
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Randomize