i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
oh god was she eating orange peels again
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Randomize
