Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
it was like eating out sand paper
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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