I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
Randomize
