I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
Randomize
