i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
Randomize