so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize