grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Randomize
