Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize