the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
yo i have your phone
... oh so you probably won't get this message
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
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