belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
you traded sex for a burrito?
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
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