Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
So some girl kept staring at me and giving me these weird looks. That's when I realized she could probably hear the Mulan soundtrack playing on my iPod...
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize