hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
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