I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
Randomize
