Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
Randomize
