Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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