It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
Randomize
