Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
Randomize
